A thank-you note is short, specific and warm. Most etiquette guides suggest sending them within about three months of the wedding — and sooner for gifts that arrive beforehand.
The formula
- Greeting: Dear Aunt Maria and Uncle Joe,
- Thank them for the specific gift.
- Say how you’ll use it or what it means.
- Mention their presence or kindness.
- A warm closing.
Examples
Registry gift
Thank you so much for the beautiful serving bowls. We’ve already used them for our first dinner party as a married couple. It meant so much to have you there to celebrate with us.
Cash or check
Thank you for your generous gift. We’re putting it toward our first home, and we’ll think of you when we get the keys. Having you with us on the day was the real gift.
Guest who couldn’t attend
We missed you at the wedding, and your card and gift made us feel so loved. Thank you for thinking of us — we can’t wait to celebrate together soon.
Wedding party
We couldn’t have done it without you. Thank you for the calm, the laughs and for holding everything together. We love you.
Gift card or experience
Thank you for the dinner gift card — we’re saving it for our first quiet night out after the wedding, and we’ll raise a glass to you.
Group gift
Thank you all for the gorgeous stand mixer. We’ve already made our first loaf of bread and burned only one. We’re so lucky to have friends like you.
Shower host
Thank you for hosting such a beautiful shower. Every detail was so thoughtful, and I felt completely celebrated.
A system that works
Keep a list of who gave what (the thank-you note tracker does this), split the list between you, and write five a night. Pre-address envelopes to make it easy.
Common questions
- Email or handwritten? Handwritten is still the gold standard for wedding gifts; a quick message first, then a card, is perfectly fine.
- Late? Send it anyway. A warm, late note is always better than none.
- Who writes? Either of you. Sign both names.
General information, not legal, medical or financial advice. Confirm details with your vendors, venue, officiant and local authorities.
Questions people ask
How long do you have to send wedding thank-you notes?
Most etiquette guides suggest within about three months.
What do you write in a thank-you card for money?
Thank them for their generosity, mention what you’ll use it for, and mention their presence or kindness.
Is it ever too late to send a wedding thank-you note?
No. A late, warm note is always appreciated more than no note at all.
Do you send thank-you notes to guests who didn’t give a gift?
It isn’t required, but a note for guests who traveled far or helped with the wedding is a lovely touch.
