Being asked is an honor. Doing it well is mostly about three things: showing up, taking load off the couple, and giving a good toast.
Maid (or matron) of honor
Before the wedding
On the day
Best man
Before the wedding
On the day
A timeline of duties
| When | What |
|---|---|
| Soon after being asked | Talk about expectations, budget and the parties |
| 3–6 months | Plan the shower and bachelor or bachelorette |
| 1–2 months | Final outfit fitting; start the toast |
| Wedding week | Rehearsal, dinner and a last check of the timeline |
| The day | Emergency kit, rings, witness signature, toast |
If money is tight
Tell the couple honestly and early. Most couples would far rather adjust plans than have you stretch beyond your means.
The toast
One story, three to five minutes, no in-jokes nobody else understands, and end by raising a glass. Read the speech guide.
General information, not legal, medical or financial advice. Confirm details with your vendors, venue, officiant and local authorities.
Questions people ask
What does the maid of honor do on the wedding day?
Helps the bride get ready, carries the emergency kit, holds the bouquet, witnesses the license if needed and gives a toast.
Who pays for the maid of honor dress?
Traditionally the maid of honor pays for her own outfit.
Can a man be the maid of honor?
Yes — “man of honor” and “best woman” are common. Choose the people closest to you.
